Here I sit and wonder how to write an about me section on my webpage that I have been procrastinating for about six weeks. I would like to think of it as writers block, yet here I sit writing a blog post. Who reads these anyway? I thought people are getting to lazy to read and just like to watch videos on you tube? Speaking of blog posts, I had completely forgot that I had good intentions of writing diligently on this blog, yet there it sat for months quite as a mouse…waiting for a crumb to drop onto the floor.
I look at other website similar to what I want to create and everyone’s about me section is so professional about their accomplishments and training. I think to myself, really who cares? I don’t know who these people are that you trained with, University degrees working in corporate offices and taking the leap when making 80+ a year with big fat payoff in the end. Now please…I’m not ditching anyone! My story is similar however making half the income, not having anything put away or a partner to fall back on. I just took the dam leap, blind folded…ya I know pretty dumb…some say brave but they do not know the rut I’m in right now trying to make ends meet. I knew this would be the outcome, I knew I would struggle at the beginning. I could have planned better.
The thing is, when I came home from my trip to Bali Indonesia I could not bear to work another day in the 9-5 Monday to Friday rutt that so many of us get stuck in. I couldn’t take it anymore, I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, I could feel it beginning to brew just under the surface of my skin. Now I loved my job, I love the people, I love what I did. I just dreaded not being able to do what I wanted to do. I would spend countless hours thinking of what I should be doing instead of god dam paperwork. Perhaps if I had a secretary to save me from the doom and boredom of paperwork I would still be there? Who knows? Probably not I would have had more time to plan my escape!
I just read a quote on Instagram as I paused, yes a distraction as my phone beeped, then I started scrolling Instagram but the message was on facebook, oh then I noticed a new post on google plus. Damn…no wonder we are so distracted lately how does on get anything accomplished these days? So yes…the quote. “Be the person you want to be remembered as” Well as it stands now. I am the person who quit my job as a Training Director at a private
Career College. Basically it’s a fancy name for a principal or dean with a quarter of the pay being its private. So quite my job after going on a trip I could really not afford, seriously couldn’t afford not to. (Sanity) Spent almost a year in Intuitive development classes and now my family thinks I’m crazy…or I think they think I’m crazy. Perhaps I am. Who knows? I feel fine. So I quit my job to start my own business. I’m 43 so I’m no spring chicken. Hey! I’m not old either, maybe it’s a mid-life crisis. All I know is, I know what I want and what I don’t want. When I gave notice to work I was leaving, two weeks into my six week notice, I meet a man. Now I have been single for some time, I met “the man” He is perfect for me. An absolute angel in my eyes. If there was a petal stool big enough for him, he would be up there! I love his company and I love just hanging out with him. So here I am about to launch my business wrapping up work, Mr. Perfect walks into my life and sets the stage for a big DISTRACTION…..squirrel…..where? This comes from a woman when I’m walking in a store and my 20 year old son says “Mom blinders, put your blinders on” He really dislikes shopping, especially at material stores!
I can be a focused individual, yesterday I spent almost the whole day stitching a really cool piece by hand. I believe it is when we procrastinate things we are not quite sure how to go about it. Like writing something about one self. Oh how I dislike writing about how good I am at something. Facebook, sure, it’s easy to boast, I get excited about things I have accomplished. That’s just friends and family. This is for the world to see. I guess it would be kind of like how uneasy I felt when I posted my first you-tube videos. The fear of being judged by others. Kind of like this writing.I want my page to reflex who I am, my silliness along with a professional attitude. I can be quite serious when the time calls for it. The problem is I have unleashed this fairy energy full of love and silliness. Yes I’m a grounded woman, yes my head can be in the clouds. I really enjoy hanging out in the 5th dimension, however my life is here in the real world. Where I have to be responsible and pay my bills. Man I could dance around all day sprinkling fairy dust on everyone I meet. The way the world is right now I would need buckets and sprinkle that shit everywhere!
So my plan now is to sell my house. I feel my next step is to sell off 75% of all my belongings (75% is a lot, I’m a pack rat, live in the country on 3 acres of land with a barn, shed and a basement) This way, I can be free of my major debits, weigh less and start the new life I want. Fresh new life, new beginnings.
This blog will be dedicated to my trials and tribulations of making it happen. Some spiritual crap, reiki, tarot cards, fairies, and angels all kinds of fun stuff. But mostly me and my journey.